I’ve glided above and beyond the waves of my life like a sea captain
who refuses to return to land.
Even when I could see myself like a sunset on the horizon,
I could never quite reach myself in time to make me happen.
The search for self was as slippery to me as the sea serpent
signifying it, and to be fair, it still is. Chris, I can see your mouth moving,
but I can’t understand you. How about some coffee?
The usual Ed. Thanks so much.
Any who, do you remember when my babysitter rode past us
on my bike while we were lying down
in the nearby field behind Tom Collins General Store,
the same sea of grass I’d run through many times while trying
to escape somebody’s vengeful sperm whale of an older brother,
the very same I used to chase black racers in, their upright onyx
bodies disappearing into veins of dirt I couldn’t find my way into
to save my life, and how something ancient and primal in me hunkered
down behind the bittersweet and began thinking across
the surface of the bottomless earth, nose to tail, to your emotions?
Well, I’m pretty sure this is because the sea in me knew
if I asked you matter of factly to disappear with me into a valley
of gold and silence, I’d not only be shut down by your parents,
but I wouldn’t be able to double back to that ship of mutual
feeling I’d need to keep me afloat when and if it came time
to survive the shipwreck of me.